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Sunday, February 28, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Need some input please!
I have a situation that has been going on for a few months that is really upsetting to me and I'm looking for some perspective & input so I'm going to have a contest for any said perspective & input! Please feel free (please please) to spread the word on this. I'll leave comments open for 2 weeks. The prize will be a $10 Target gift card or a Topsy Turvy Tomato planter. I will randomly pick from the comments to award the prize.
Some background info:
-I have been best friends with Jessi since we were 14 (we're now 36 & 37) and there is a group of us that have been best friends since the same time. The other two are Monika & Maria.
-Monika is married with 4 kids, Maria is married with 2 kids, I am unmarried with 1 child, and Jessi is unmarried & childless. Jessi is also in a relatively new relationship with someone named Andy. Maria, Monika & I are less than excited about this relationship because Andy has DEEPLY hurt Jessi more than once in they short time they've been together. I have expressed to Andy my distrust of him & his intentions.
-These friends of mine are fully aware of the situation at my house and the relationship with my mom. They have been witness to it for years.
Now onto the "situation"
One Sunday night in November my mom & I had a huge blowup and she told me she wanted me out that night. I sent a text message to my 3 best friends asking if I could stay with them for a night or so until I could get into a homeless shelter and figure out my next step (around here you cannot just go to a homeless shelter at any time. You have to check in and hope there is room- something that cannot be done on a Sunday night). I heard back from Monika very quickly asking what was going on & if I was ok. She said she didn't have a spare room at this time but she could put the baby in her room if I needed to stay. She also asked if I'd heard from Jessi since she had the most room out of the 3 of them. I replied back that I hadn't heard from Jessi but would let her know what was going on. Monika continued to check in with me throughout the evening to see how I was doing. I heard from Maria around 10:30pm and she asked what happened & if I was ok. Her phone had been off and charging. I never heard from Jessi that night. Nor the next day, or the day after that or anytime since. My mom & I worked through things (kind of) and I sent a text message to Monika & Maria telling them I was fine and would fill them in when I could talk. My feelings were horribly hurt as the week went on & I never heard from Jessi. This is supposed to be my best friend & I haven't heard word one from her. When I was having a 6 1/2 year old party for Princess Bear since she hadn't had her birthday party I had invited Maria & Monika & their kids. I then realized I was being small & sent Jessi a message since Princess Bear does love her. I told her about the tea party & her response was that she'd heard about it. Ok- I told her about it a few months earlier & couldn't quite figure out her deal. I asked her what the deal was & why she was being pissy. This someone led to a texting situation and finally she said she hadn't heard from me. Hmmm- maybe because I hadn't heard from you since a really bad situation in my life & I was a little hurt. Her response was "I love you but I cannot live with you" Well, I didn't ask to LIVE with you- I asked for a place to spend the night for a night or two! I think there is a huge difference! Jessi ended the texting with saying she didn't want to fight with me. No I'm sorry or anything along those lines. At that point I went from having my feelings very hurt to just being upset. I didn't try contacting Jessi in anyway for a few weeks. Jessi then sent me a text a few weeks later telling me that Zeus (her dog) was very ill. At first I was still so upset with her I didn't even want to deal with her or the situation. I also knew that I was being ridiculous & this wasn't the way a 22 year friendship should be played out. I sent her a text asking what was going on & to keep me posted. Shortly there after (either that night or the next day) I put "Sometimes friendships need to be evaluated" as my facebook status. In all actuality it wasn't even a reference to her. The next morning I wake up to a comment on my status from Andy saying how when that usually happens to him he finds if he looks in the mirror that is where the problem usually is. WHOA! All I could think is that this A-hole really needed to back off. The comment wasn't about Jessi & even if it was she is fully capable of defending herself. What is he doing putting himself in the middle of this. Next thing I know a few hours later I'm getting flying text messages from Jessi telling me how hurt she is that I would put something on Facebook about her and that she is heartbroken. Again the status was "Sometimes friendships need to be evaluated". NOTHING ABOUT HER!!!! I really didn't even think she would think it was about her until Andy came running to her rescue which is exactly what I told her. I mentioned that it wasn't even pertaining to her and nothing. She just stayed with the thought that it was about her. Maria actually told her who I was thinking of when I wrote that status comment. Still hadn't heard anything! On Christmas day Zeus died. Jess sent me a text. I started to text her back & realized that is not how I would have dealt with it if we weren't at odds so I called her. Of course she didn't pick up the phone so I left her a voicemail telling her how sorry I was & to let me know if she needed something. Jessi got a new dog a few days later. Still haven't heard from here. I sent her a text a few days later saying I had a coupon for some organic dog food if she wanted it. We sent a few texts back & forth so I thought things were ok. We obviously weren't going to deal with the issue but just move beyond it. Ok- not the best scenario but I can deal with it. I sent her a text the next day & once again didn't hear back from her and we're right back to square one.
So, please give me your opinion on this situation. I really don't think I've done anything wrong & even tried to be the bigger person. I'm still so hurt by the way Jessi has acted throughout the whole situation. Never ever have I asked the 3 of them for a place to stay so that in itself should have let them know how bad the situation was. Jessi was also told that the facebook status was not about her. Instead of apologizing for jumping my a** she did nothing. I also think that Andy is a major part in all of this. He was more than willing to try to put the fault on me by telling me to look in the mirror and he knows that Monika, Maria & I are very skeptical of him. Unfortunately for me I'm the loud outspoken one and am the only one who actually shared our doubts with him. What he has to realize is just because I'm the only one who said something doesn't mean I'm the only one thinking it. He had made several comments to Jessi in the past about me hating him. Not true but I think he didn't mind that there was something to create a rift between me & Jessi and don't think he is an unbiased opinion for her to seek on the matter. So, tell me-
1) Have I done anything wrong?
2) Have I been unfair?
3) What do you think I should do about the situation?
I'm asking for your advice so feel free to lay it out there!
Some background info:
-I have been best friends with Jessi since we were 14 (we're now 36 & 37) and there is a group of us that have been best friends since the same time. The other two are Monika & Maria.
-Monika is married with 4 kids, Maria is married with 2 kids, I am unmarried with 1 child, and Jessi is unmarried & childless. Jessi is also in a relatively new relationship with someone named Andy. Maria, Monika & I are less than excited about this relationship because Andy has DEEPLY hurt Jessi more than once in they short time they've been together. I have expressed to Andy my distrust of him & his intentions.
-These friends of mine are fully aware of the situation at my house and the relationship with my mom. They have been witness to it for years.
Now onto the "situation"
One Sunday night in November my mom & I had a huge blowup and she told me she wanted me out that night. I sent a text message to my 3 best friends asking if I could stay with them for a night or so until I could get into a homeless shelter and figure out my next step (around here you cannot just go to a homeless shelter at any time. You have to check in and hope there is room- something that cannot be done on a Sunday night). I heard back from Monika very quickly asking what was going on & if I was ok. She said she didn't have a spare room at this time but she could put the baby in her room if I needed to stay. She also asked if I'd heard from Jessi since she had the most room out of the 3 of them. I replied back that I hadn't heard from Jessi but would let her know what was going on. Monika continued to check in with me throughout the evening to see how I was doing. I heard from Maria around 10:30pm and she asked what happened & if I was ok. Her phone had been off and charging. I never heard from Jessi that night. Nor the next day, or the day after that or anytime since. My mom & I worked through things (kind of) and I sent a text message to Monika & Maria telling them I was fine and would fill them in when I could talk. My feelings were horribly hurt as the week went on & I never heard from Jessi. This is supposed to be my best friend & I haven't heard word one from her. When I was having a 6 1/2 year old party for Princess Bear since she hadn't had her birthday party I had invited Maria & Monika & their kids. I then realized I was being small & sent Jessi a message since Princess Bear does love her. I told her about the tea party & her response was that she'd heard about it. Ok- I told her about it a few months earlier & couldn't quite figure out her deal. I asked her what the deal was & why she was being pissy. This someone led to a texting situation and finally she said she hadn't heard from me. Hmmm- maybe because I hadn't heard from you since a really bad situation in my life & I was a little hurt. Her response was "I love you but I cannot live with you" Well, I didn't ask to LIVE with you- I asked for a place to spend the night for a night or two! I think there is a huge difference! Jessi ended the texting with saying she didn't want to fight with me. No I'm sorry or anything along those lines. At that point I went from having my feelings very hurt to just being upset. I didn't try contacting Jessi in anyway for a few weeks. Jessi then sent me a text a few weeks later telling me that Zeus (her dog) was very ill. At first I was still so upset with her I didn't even want to deal with her or the situation. I also knew that I was being ridiculous & this wasn't the way a 22 year friendship should be played out. I sent her a text asking what was going on & to keep me posted. Shortly there after (either that night or the next day) I put "Sometimes friendships need to be evaluated" as my facebook status. In all actuality it wasn't even a reference to her. The next morning I wake up to a comment on my status from Andy saying how when that usually happens to him he finds if he looks in the mirror that is where the problem usually is. WHOA! All I could think is that this A-hole really needed to back off. The comment wasn't about Jessi & even if it was she is fully capable of defending herself. What is he doing putting himself in the middle of this. Next thing I know a few hours later I'm getting flying text messages from Jessi telling me how hurt she is that I would put something on Facebook about her and that she is heartbroken. Again the status was "Sometimes friendships need to be evaluated". NOTHING ABOUT HER!!!! I really didn't even think she would think it was about her until Andy came running to her rescue which is exactly what I told her. I mentioned that it wasn't even pertaining to her and nothing. She just stayed with the thought that it was about her. Maria actually told her who I was thinking of when I wrote that status comment. Still hadn't heard anything! On Christmas day Zeus died. Jess sent me a text. I started to text her back & realized that is not how I would have dealt with it if we weren't at odds so I called her. Of course she didn't pick up the phone so I left her a voicemail telling her how sorry I was & to let me know if she needed something. Jessi got a new dog a few days later. Still haven't heard from here. I sent her a text a few days later saying I had a coupon for some organic dog food if she wanted it. We sent a few texts back & forth so I thought things were ok. We obviously weren't going to deal with the issue but just move beyond it. Ok- not the best scenario but I can deal with it. I sent her a text the next day & once again didn't hear back from her and we're right back to square one.
So, please give me your opinion on this situation. I really don't think I've done anything wrong & even tried to be the bigger person. I'm still so hurt by the way Jessi has acted throughout the whole situation. Never ever have I asked the 3 of them for a place to stay so that in itself should have let them know how bad the situation was. Jessi was also told that the facebook status was not about her. Instead of apologizing for jumping my a** she did nothing. I also think that Andy is a major part in all of this. He was more than willing to try to put the fault on me by telling me to look in the mirror and he knows that Monika, Maria & I are very skeptical of him. Unfortunately for me I'm the loud outspoken one and am the only one who actually shared our doubts with him. What he has to realize is just because I'm the only one who said something doesn't mean I'm the only one thinking it. He had made several comments to Jessi in the past about me hating him. Not true but I think he didn't mind that there was something to create a rift between me & Jessi and don't think he is an unbiased opinion for her to seek on the matter. So, tell me-
1) Have I done anything wrong?
2) Have I been unfair?
3) What do you think I should do about the situation?
I'm asking for your advice so feel free to lay it out there!
Monday, February 22, 2010
Thank you, Mr. Virus!
I would like to thank the POS virus that invaded my daughters body leading to another Promptcare trip yesterday resulting in her being put on steroids once again and has apparently set up camp in my body too. Damn thing! Be gone with you!
Saturday, February 20, 2010
New Blog
Please take a look and let me know what you think!!! Also feel free to spread the word if you want!!! Sarah Simplifies
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Just a day
Ok- so I've got to admit I've really not got a whole lot. I'm trying to set up my other blog so when things calm down & can plow ahead with that one & I'm not feeling the best. I think a trip to the physicians assistant is in order. Now to find the time! I will share just a few of the quirks of my brain. Here we go with random musings!
-How does one know when they are seriously PMSy?
Well, if you happen to be me, it is a sure sign when you're sobbing watching The Wedding on Keeping Up with the Kardashians. The show isn't on my must see list but occasionally its fun to watch. Last night they had a marathon leading up to the season finale. I also have to admit at this point in my life I have not real tracking system for when its that time of the month. After one of my best friends was hospitalized for blood clots in her lungs I got off the pill much to my gyno's dismay. I'm not in a relationship of any type that would require me to keep track so I basically don't. (You should see the nurses face at a Dr's appt when they ask when my last period is- I don't know a few weeks ago) So I realized as I was watching the Wedding preps on the show & crying it must be PMS
and one last how do you know
-How do you know when your cat is too fat?
Ok, I admit it. I have a fat cat. This is not exaggeration. Last time she was weighed she was 15 lbs and she weighs more now. My sister & bil call her Jabba the Cat. So yes I am fully aware my cat is fat- she fits in with the household perfectly! That said when said cat is so fat she can not clean herself well & I have to clean her privates the cat is too fat! Bathing a cat is not fun if you haven't tried it, so Fluff is heading for a diet!
Well, that's it for this side!
Sarah
-How does one know when they are seriously PMSy?
Well, if you happen to be me, it is a sure sign when you're sobbing watching The Wedding on Keeping Up with the Kardashians. The show isn't on my must see list but occasionally its fun to watch. Last night they had a marathon leading up to the season finale. I also have to admit at this point in my life I have not real tracking system for when its that time of the month. After one of my best friends was hospitalized for blood clots in her lungs I got off the pill much to my gyno's dismay. I'm not in a relationship of any type that would require me to keep track so I basically don't. (You should see the nurses face at a Dr's appt when they ask when my last period is- I don't know a few weeks ago) So I realized as I was watching the Wedding preps on the show & crying it must be PMS
and one last how do you know
-How do you know when your cat is too fat?
Ok, I admit it. I have a fat cat. This is not exaggeration. Last time she was weighed she was 15 lbs and she weighs more now. My sister & bil call her Jabba the Cat. So yes I am fully aware my cat is fat- she fits in with the household perfectly! That said when said cat is so fat she can not clean herself well & I have to clean her privates the cat is too fat! Bathing a cat is not fun if you haven't tried it, so Fluff is heading for a diet!
Well, that's it for this side!
Sarah
Friday, February 12, 2010
The Olympics
Ok, so I admit it- I'm a big old sentamental freak but I always get teary eyed watching the opening ceremonies of the Olympics! Princess Bear wasn't very into but did want to carry a flag! My child has a innocence that I find so precious! If I could just protect her from the real world :( Now I need to go google several questions I have from watching the said opening ceremonies:
- Why is Ireland its own entity but not Scotland?
- Why are the Native People of Canada called the First Nations?
and there's a few more but frankly I'm about brain dead!
Sarah
- Why is Ireland its own entity but not Scotland?
- Why are the Native People of Canada called the First Nations?
and there's a few more but frankly I'm about brain dead!
Sarah
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Ugh!
I'm seriously ready for some big down time. I have this feeling of being on a hamster wheel or something like it. Princess Bear (PB) has had another tough year at school this year. I understand that children need to learn about grades at some point in time. I also understand that my daughter is in a special ed first grade. Does she really need to know she got a "F" or 0%??? If it was a subject that we hadn't be having monumental struggles with I might not be so upset but I really feel like this is just another chip away at her self esteem. So, am I overreacting? Give me some feedback!
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Another "pop" b&*ch
So finally the drama seems to be dying down with the NBC Leno vs O'Brien fiasco. The article supporting O'Brien is SO not accurate it just makes me want to scream! What most supporters of O'Brien forgot is that in some ways Conan is getting EXACTLY what he deserves! Leno NEVER wanted to retire! 5 years ago NBC almost lost O'Brien and in a stupid attempt to keep him at NBC they promised him The Tonight Show in 5 years. Fast forward 5 years and NBC is still going forward with this idiotic plan. Let's not discuss the fact that Leno has consistently been #1. That apparently doesn't matter when you're faced with losing a "talent". Ratings don't matter. Or do they? Well, they surely matter when Conan comes in and flubs it up from the word GO. I must also mention that Leno's prime time slot did not do well. Then again I don't think that was a huge surprise to anyone. So NBC wanting to get the ratings back that they had enjoyed during Leno's Late Night tenure offer him a 1/2 slot before the Tonight Show with O'Brien. Once again O'Brien pitches a fit and starts spouting garbage about how it would be the end of The Tonight Show. HONESTLY???? Where did the man get his chutzpah???!!!??? As we all know Conan picked up his ball and went running home- bye bye!!! I can't wait for the return of the Tonight Show with Jay Leno! I can however wait a very, very, very (perhaps an entire lifetime!) long time before ever watching Conan O'Brien again!
Ok- of the soap box for the day!
Ok- of the soap box for the day!
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Hola!
Wow! I haven't been on here in FOREVER!!! I must confess I do miss it. I find blogging so soothing to the soul. Perhaps 2010 will be a much better blogging year! I have tried to keep up & check in with a few of my favorite blogs. It just seems like Princess Bear got sick with H1N1 and things went & stayed downhill for her for the duration. She had walking pneumonia over Christmas vacation and is flirting with it again right now. She's done with the antibiotics and she isn't coughing as much but is still not "ok" yet. This has not been one of our better winters!
As for me I've forgotten a lot of the sign language I learned last semester. I wish it was a twice a week class so I had more of an opportunity to use it. I'm excitedly planning our garden. January was so much fun with all the seed catalogs coming in! It was better than Christmas! One of my favorite sites is www.rareseeds.com I have decided that any seeds I plant will be heirloom or at the very least not chemically treated in anyway. In the past week and a half I have read: Backyard Homestead, A Slice of Organic Life, Country Living for Dummies, and The Victory Garden. I'm getting ready to start a gardening journal and can't wait to get the ball rolling on things! I've learned so much more than I did last year and that was a learning experience all in itself. I really hope that the garden is a success & Princess Bear and I can have a very back to the earth, self sufficient summer!
So, that is news on this side! I do promise to try much harder this year!
As for me I've forgotten a lot of the sign language I learned last semester. I wish it was a twice a week class so I had more of an opportunity to use it. I'm excitedly planning our garden. January was so much fun with all the seed catalogs coming in! It was better than Christmas! One of my favorite sites is www.rareseeds.com I have decided that any seeds I plant will be heirloom or at the very least not chemically treated in anyway. In the past week and a half I have read: Backyard Homestead, A Slice of Organic Life, Country Living for Dummies, and The Victory Garden. I'm getting ready to start a gardening journal and can't wait to get the ball rolling on things! I've learned so much more than I did last year and that was a learning experience all in itself. I really hope that the garden is a success & Princess Bear and I can have a very back to the earth, self sufficient summer!
So, that is news on this side! I do promise to try much harder this year!
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