I don't think I could ever tire of looking at them! Especially Tim! But on to the topic. I had a conversation with my daughter that I never, ever, EVER thought I'd be having. As I mentioned yesterday was one of my mom's blow up dates. The usual not so pretty screaming and yelling and her telling me to get out. At 9 years old Princess Bear (PB) is more than aware when this stuff happens not that it slows my mom down a bit. The whole thing was over the general state of the house which while not wonderful wasn't that bad. Then again my mom isn't know for being reasonable or rational. I will say PB's room was a complete s@#t hole. I've basically gotten to the point that its just not worth the fight. PB has been sick lately and I'm done doing the total room overhauls. My mom on the other hand wants it picked up at all times. So the melee ensued. I finally looked at PB at one point when my mom wasn't in the immediate area and asked her if Mommy had to leave the house did she want to go with me or stay at my parents. My parents would have you think that I'm the worse mother in the world to even contemplate taking her with me until I'm on my feet. Especially since some time at a homeless shelter would be necessary. I understand that it would be a huge change and somewhat scary for PB. Really I do. I also understand that I can't complete trust my parents and that if I left PB here that they might try to use that against me to gain custody of her. While I do love my parents I'm not thinking they are the best choice of custodians for her. I also think that as scary as a shelter might be that PB would be very traumatized to be away from me. It's always been me and her and she has spent 2 nights away from me in her life. Much to my relief PB instantly pointed her finger at me indicating that she wanted to go with me. She wanted to know how soon we could move, could we pack all her things and could the cat and dog go with us. Actually she was somewhat excited about potentially moving. Bless my child's heart! I also know that when the time comes that we either move out on our own accord or my mom kicks us out that PB will have a very hard time transitioning. This has been the only home she really remembers and she does love her grandparents when my mom is being a decent human being.
Now on the upside of all of this is that PB's room is nice and neat. I can't say I have huge hopes for it but we'll see. My mom wants me going in there 4 or 5 times a day to do spot checks and have her pick up. C'mon she's 9 and its just a room!
On completely benign and boring side notes other than for a bit this morning when my mom seemed to want to continue the ugliness it was a nice day. Fall has definitely arrived here in Central Illinois!!! We woke to a bright, crisp morning. My dad came in and told me to turn off my alarm. No need to twist my arm!!! So PB and I slept until a bit after 8am. We got up and chilled for a bit and then I jumped in the shower when it seemed like my mom was in a decent enough mood to be around PB. Sunday school started a few weeks ago but she missed the first 2 weeks due to not feeling well. She was a bit nervous but excited that Sophia would be in her class again! I was a bit nervous because I didn't know that the class for for 3rd, 4th and 5th graders. That seems like a pretty broad range to me. All in all it went well and PB seemed to enjoy herself. She came home with some Saints cards so I told her to discuss them with her Dzadza (grandfather) since that is more his thing. We got home in time to watch the Fox pregame show. Ah the boys on Fox are back and I couldn't be happier!!! Of course my mom wanted PB to get in her room immediately and pick it up. We had to finish the blanket PB made for her best friend Shay since she is still home recovering from surgery. We had plans to go visit and I wanted to have PB finish it so I could wash it and we could take it with us. I've got to say that PB did a great job with all the knots!!! We had a great time visiting with Shay and Laura. The girls had a blast and I introduced Laura to the King brothers!!!! I've converted another person!!!! Laura also told me if it ever gets to the point that my mom does kick me out that PB and I are more than welcome there. It was nice to know that I won't be totally screwed. Oh we also watched the Bears go. They stomped all over St. Louis. I know its not a huge feat but I'll love any win we get!!! We went to 5pm mass and that about rounds out our day. So that is todays story morning glory!!!!
Sarah
No comments:
Post a Comment