Thursday, October 14, 2010

An exercise in frustration

I've been helping with my nephews a lot. This started before Luke was born because my sisters carpal tunnel was so bad she could barely change Tyler's diapers. I stayed there for a week when Luke was born so my brother could be at the hospital with Kate during the day all day. I was ready to go loco by the end of it. I love my daughter & I love my oldest nephew almost to adoration. The two of them together are fun but absolutely feed off each other. One night I actually went to Kroger to just be by myself for a little while- thats how much I just needed to escape for awhile. My sister has had one health issue after another since giving birth and I've spent almost every weekday out there helping her. Now my sister is the family golden child while I am the black sheep and she is perfectly aware of this. Add to that my sister is a very difficult person to please and its a hard situation at best. Frankly I need the money and I adore my oldest nephew who really didn't deal with the adjustment to being a big brother and really needed some special attention and love. My sister just called me to bitch about the state of the basement. Ok yes its my fault I forgot to go back down there and pick up. Tyler and I had gone down there to play because my sister & Luke were taking a nap in the family room. The basement isn't as much fun because there are only a few toys down there and Tyler isn't supposed to watch TV with me (I'm supposed to engage him while I'm there). That all said Tyler is recovering from a bad cold and was happy to just chill with Aunt Sarah & look through catalogs. Yes, my nephew is addicted to catalogs! :) My sister called me and asked me to come up because Luke needed a bottle and she had to pump. I said we'd be up after I cleaned up. Well I didn't get everything cleaned up before she was going crazy telling me to come up now that she was putting Luke in the bouncer. Now did she start a bottle warming? Nope. So I get up there and start Luke's bottle and make more juice/ pedialyte for Tyler. Fast forward several hours and I got Tyler down for his nap and then Luke. I fell asleep holding Luke. (man, I hate when I wake myself up because I just snored!) Well, my sister called to complain about the state of the basement. I immediately apologized. I forgot, not much I can do but apologize. She then asked where the TV remote was. I don't know! We didn't watch TV! I told her that and she went into how Tyler obviously moved the remote and I wasn't watching him and if they couldn't find the remote and my bil couldn't watch TV he was going to be pissed. Um ok I can understand that. Now lets talk about the reality of it- a very short in stature not quite 3 year old couldn't have hidden it in that many places! I offered to come out there and help her look. Its a 20 minute ride and I'm glad she declined. I feel bad that I forgot about picking up. I am getting paid so I should have done a good job. The remote will turn up so please calm down! The people in my family truly have no coping mechanisms. Now they will tell you that I am to laid back and lazy but honestly I don't see the point in completely freaking out. I do my share of that but try to keep it to a minimum. My stress level is too high as it is! So that is the story of today! Hoping tomorrow is smoother!


Jen on the Edge said...

With all due respect, sometimes I wonder if you might not be happier if you moved away from your parents and sister.

That said, regardless of the fact that she's paying you, your sister is not treating you well. Would she talk like that and behave that way with a regular old sitter? I think not.

Susan said...

I keep telling you that she needs to learn how to deal with her family. She's gotten in the habit of other people caring for her kids, she soon won't be able to do it herself at all.