Tuesday, December 17, 2013

My kid cracks me up!

My child has been in rare form lately!  Every once in awhile she busts out with something that just leaves me chuckling, shaking my head and muttering something along the lines of  "seriously?".   For example last night Princess Bear (PB), my dad and I were watching the end of the Dallas vs Green Bay game.  Now for those of you who don't know it we are die hard Chicago Bears fans in this household.  As in my youngest nephew used to growl whenever I came to visit and point at my shirt if I wasn't wearing some sort of Bears attire.  PB has more Chicago Bears hair accessories and jewelry than any 12 kids would need and more than a few jerseys to boot. 

Consequently, we LOVE it when some team takes down the Packers.  Well, Romo had to do some showboating in last nights game and it cost the Cowboys the game.  My dad was slightly disgusted and turned off the TV has he said something like "well that probably cost Chicago the playoffs" (we have to play GB again in 2 weeks).  To which I quipped "Dammit....let's go burn the Gray's Packers flag".  Completely kidding.  Ok, not completely but I'm not looking for any jail time due to arson or destruction of personal property.  The Gray's are family friends of ours that live down the block and are big Packers fans.  We hassle them and they hassle us.  Our parish priest joins in the fun.  Several years ago my dad and Mr. Gray made a $1 bet on a Bears vs Packers game.  The Bears won so Mr. Gray paid up in pennies.  My dad still has the envelope of pennies hanging up on the wall in his den.  So joking around about destroying the Gray's Packers flag is pretty normal for us.  So after I suggested burning the flag, PB says "Naw, lets just hide it from them.".  She proceeds to put on her coat and gloves and was ready to take off down the street to fetch the flag.  I was completely cracking up.  My dad is one of those pretty silent guys but he has his tells.  You can always tell when he's pleased or bullshitting based on whether his dimples are showing or not.  If he's pissed the back of his neck gets red and splotchy.  Poker is so not the game for me dad.  After PB's comment about hiding the flag his dimples were showing big time.  It took a whole lot of reasoning to convince PB that we were not walking down the street (in the 5 inches of snow that hadn't been plowed yet!) to play capture the flag NFL style.  She takes it a bit further and tells me a few minutes later that a mission like this is why she needs some camo gear.  She's recently become a Duck Dynasty fan and has been begging for one of the pink camo baseball Duck Dynasty hats.  The kid seriously looked and me and thought that she would convince me that this was the perfect reason to buy her some camo gear.  Love it! 

Today she was filling her teacher and the aide in on the fact that Farm Kings were going to start airing again this coming Thursday night.  The teacher asked what time it was on and PB said 8pm.  The teacher asked what time PB usually went to bed.  8pm.  Oops!  Might have a conflict there!  Friday is the last day of school before Christmas vacation.  My daughter looked at her teacher and the aide and said "Well, I'm sorry but I've been waiting for the Farm Kings to come back for ages and I've got to stay up and see them more than I've got to come to school on Friday.  Tell ya what- how about I take my spelling test on Thursday so I can stay up late Thursday night and not have a test?"  So guess who is taking her spelling test Thursday?  She's not going to miss the entire day.  Hell, it's a short day anyway and part of it is the school talent show.  I just won't be waking her up a the butt crack of down. 

My child knows exactly what she wants and what she has to do to get it!  Along the way she's keeping me pretty damned entertained.  Life is good.  Life is definitely good!

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